I have spent this weekend apart from Aldo. He drove to the City to attend his sister’s wedding and let himself be talked into staying at his mother’s for two nights. The drive is pretty far and it pains him, so I understand. This is the first time in memory that he has left me for any extended amount of time. I usually do the leaving; I pack up the kids to go visit far flung friends or to spend a week at Mother’s. I don’t know why it should make a difference, if I am the one going away… but it seems to.
I admit it’s a little like a vacation. I have not watched the news in two days, opting instead to watch decorating shows and chick flicks late into the night. The kids and I have had Thankful leftovers for dinner, and I let them have pumpkin pie and hot chocolate for breakfast. Cleaning seems to be much easier with one less person in the house. The dogs seem to enjoy the extra room to lay on the bed with me. I have enjoyed the quiet. Who knew it was my husband who made so much racket?
Even when we are both home I don’t see him every minute. We have what I think of as a fairly large home; it’s easy to be separate. Aldo withdraws from the family during the day. He goes away from the chaos to lay quietly upstairs and read. He goes outside to sit on the porch and smoke. I often think that we are “together” but we don’t spend much time with each other.
But I hear him. One would think I would not sleep as well without him. The last two nights, I have surprised myself by sleeping until morning… something I nearly never do. I realized this morning that it was because I did not hear Aldo snoring or fixing himself a late night snack or talking to the news commentators. I did not get up to turn the lights, radio and TV off, or to make sure the doors were locked because I knew no one else touched them after I did.
When I turned off the lights to go to bed, the darkness was complete save for the greenish light cast by the digital clock. The children slept soundlessly. The dogs sighed a few times and cuddled up on the end of the bed. I laid on the freshly made bed that no one had rumpled during the day and listened to the big clock in the kitchen. In the silence of the night, all the way upstairs I could hear it tick.
